the kitchen sink

all you need is a dirty kitchen sink (or a whole kitchen) + sponge + a bottle of soft scrub

it's like a therapy session.  for free.

i clean when i have angst in my life -- or when i feel that way --  or at least i used to before i found some roommates -- now i talk to them about it all -- now after reading this they are going to be handing me a sponge and a bottle of soft scrub...shoot.

when you clean you start with something that is usually kind of yucky and and end up with something that is usually kind of not yucky.  and maybe shiny.  and smelling of soft scrub.  --have i mentioned my love affair with soft scrub yet?  it is long lasting and never ending --

today -- today -- well, today was a good day.  everyday that i'm alive is a good day.  but today was also a little obnoxious in a lot of small, intermittent ways.

this evening consisted of complaining about it (sometimes i say telling stories about it or venting -- but tonight was just plain complaining because i was mostly all over it but just wanted to complain about it anyways in an annoyed and sometimes exclamatory way -- that is a main point in the differences between telling a story and complaining) -- kim very nicely listened to me.   she doesn't say much.   she rarely complains.  i tell her it is good that i love her so much.  tonight i told her at least i wasn't complaining about her -- she agreed.

this brings me back to the kitchen sink.  i complained too much tonight (and maybe some other nights in the more recent future)... shoot.

kitchen sink think.  free therapy while scrubbing the sink (counters+cupboards+stove)

unfortunately, it's not a brand new think.  i wish i could say that i was a more perfect and uncomplaining person --- i blame it on being an almost only child for the first part of my life and on my grandma spoiling me (that doesn't really count as a good excuse does it...)  i don't think that i am the person who complains the most -- but if i am the one who complains the most in my house what does that mean...shoot.  does it make a difference that everyone else just says it in their head and i just say it out loud? ...shoot.

our kitchen sink is going to be the shiniest one in the neighborhood.

p.s.  didn't you know that i plan all my character building just in time for spring cleaning?

p.s.s. i do reserve the right to point out that daily end of the year program practice with kiddos --who have spring fever, raging hormones, and less than a double digit number of days before summer vacation  -- is enough to make anyone just a little bit crazy

5 minutes + action steps

tonight:

*the song stuck in my head -- gotta love it-- we are learning it at the preschool for the end of the year program --red raincoat -- by courtney campbell.
*loving survivor
*wishing jon was here so we could watch grey's and private practice -- the suspense is driving me crazy
*listening to chirping crickets and such...


--- something that i started with my girlfriends awhile back -- i don't know if it is original or not, but it was new for me...  we were on one of our road trips having our usual conversations about water privatization, homogenized milk, organic vs. non organic, healthcare, bleach & pesticides, children taking apart old electronics, pre-washed salad mixes with poo in them and chickens that never see daylight, etc...  (you'd have to meet my friends to understand this conversation)
basically the fact that there is a lot of really crummy things out there and not a lot that you can do about much of it-- so, since i (and several others who i know) could tend to like to worry about the world and all that is in it, thus driving ourselves crazy...enough was enough.  i can't fix all the problems and worrying never brings results except taking years off of your life and leaving you with a perpetual headache -- enter the "5 minute" rule ( which may also be applied to many other things too ).  5 minutes to worry, fret or complain.  then be finished.  either stop thinking about it or take an "action step."  i find it unrealistic to say "don't worry" -- i've decided that what works best for me is to set a limit to my worrying.  while some things seem to require 5 minutes a day rather than just 5 minutes,  it still limits my ocd worrying tendencies.  i wish i was one of those laid back people who never worried about anything (like if what i just said came out right, if everyone is getting along, did i put sunscreen on my nose or turn off the flat iron before i left the house), but alas, i am just not made that way-- which is why i married someone who is the opposite of myself...  which brings me to the next problem -- the one where i want to be perfect and live in a perfect world where all is happiness, sunshine, and rainbows -- not to mention all natural and organic.   this presents some difficulty when colliding with the reality that is-- and probably is the source of 99.9% of my worries.  ---did i mention that i am also a "fixer" -- yes, so when all is not sunshine and rainbows in my little world, i worry.  and i try to fix.

worrier + fixer = unacceptable state of mind.  enter the solution (or part of it seeing as a complete change of personality is a little hard to order) -- 5 minutes + action step

i really like those two words "action step" -- but then i really like labels too --  there is something about having a go-to phrase that helps me along the way.  so after my 5 minutes are up -- i either need to stop worrying or create (and follow through with) an action step.  i think it is empowering.  it allows some control over something that you may other wise not have (or feel that you have) any control over.  it gives you courage to face obstacles because you are making a choice to act instead of doing nothing, or doing nothing but worrying.

two for tuesday -- things that drive me cRaZy

too much of --- the best chocolate cake ever ---available

we made it this weekend and melissa didn't eat her share

french vanilla reed diffuser

let's talk about my nose for a minute -- when i first got this diffuser, i put all the reeds in it and placed it on the dresser in my bedroom.  i forgot two very important things - one - ...for my nose...it is generally a bad idea to put all the reeds in when you have filled it pretty full if the room is not super large because --two-- ventilation is good when you have put all the reeds in the reed diffuser. 

so, i put it in my room and then closed the door the next day while i was out of the house.  

i came home and the room smelled just like french vanilla -- like it's supposed to right?

well, back to my nose. 

my nose decided that the french vanilla smelled too much in my room

so i moved it to the office

my nose still smelled it too much in the office, even with only three reeds in it and the window open

so i moved it to the dining room

my nose still smells the french vanilla reed diffuser.

kim says she can't smell it at all

--and she had one in her room last fall--with the door closed-- for a long time--

my nose still smells it, and sometimes it gets a big whiff if i stop in the right spot

it makes me want to vomit...almost

but i refuse to take it out of the room.

my nose is just going to deal with the fact that once it decides it's had too much of a smell it doesn't like it ever again-- because my brain has decided that it is going to leave the diffuser sitting into the dining room until the french vanilla smell is no more.

i can smell it right now...